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And now...Destiny Dice.
I was feeling overwhelmed by the randomness of fate, and yet, thanks to a gift given to my sister, I now possess in my hand the power to know the future. Yes, I am holding (borrowed) Destiny Dice.
I am not certain how I managed to get through my everyday life without the guidance these dice provide. The Destiny Card provided sums it up beautifully: "Roll your Destiny Dice to learn what your fate will be today." Yes, these dice will tell you everything, as long as it falls within twelve set possibilities. They'll even tell you the astrological sign of the person from which the action originates. Who says divination is useless?
Holding my breath, I roll the dice...
"Opportunity" and "Pisces"
Hmm. Somehow this isn't as detailed a map of my day's fate as I hoped to receive. My faith in the dice is beginning to waver.
Destiny Dice
Ever wondered what to do? Ever found yourself in a situation where you had no idea what path to take next? If so, then Destiny Dice are for you! Forget about those pesky decision-making skills. Obliviate your qualms about which fork of the road to traverse. Give yourself over to the Dice and let them control your future! One roll from the dice and your entire day's course will become clear!
Face your future with foreknowledge!
Sally Clueless of Budgie Downs writes: "I was lost until I found the Destiny Dice. Now I don't even get out of bed without consulting them!"
Roger Gullible of Hamsterdam writes: "Until I stole the Destiny Dice from my ex, I had no idea who to mug next. Now I know! Thanks, Destiny Dice!"
Shawn Kismetscareshim of New Nork writes: " I was forever wondering which documents to shred until I got Destiny Dice! They told me to quit that no-end accounting job. Now I rub pudding on my face and throw trout on my neighbor's lawn every day at six! I'm even shredding for myself now. No more oppression from corporate culture! I shred my own restraining orders instead!"
Whitney Tealeaves writes: "My life was a dark sucking hole of depression and despair until the Destiny Dice levitated me out of it using their astonishing floating force fields. Now I don't go anywhere without them! I even have them in my hand right now! The symbols have rubbed off, but I don't need them to know what the Dice are saying to me. They whisper their secrets in my ear and I just know what to do. They sound vaguely like the Thompson Twins."
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Destiny Dice pic |
I am not certain how I managed to get through my everyday life without the guidance these dice provide. The Destiny Card provided sums it up beautifully: "Roll your Destiny Dice to learn what your fate will be today." Yes, these dice will tell you everything, as long as it falls within twelve set possibilities. They'll even tell you the astrological sign of the person from which the action originates. Who says divination is useless?
Holding my breath, I roll the dice...
"Opportunity" and "Pisces"
Hmm. Somehow this isn't as detailed a map of my day's fate as I hoped to receive. My faith in the dice is beginning to waver.
Destiny Dice
Ever wondered what to do? Ever found yourself in a situation where you had no idea what path to take next? If so, then Destiny Dice are for you! Forget about those pesky decision-making skills. Obliviate your qualms about which fork of the road to traverse. Give yourself over to the Dice and let them control your future! One roll from the dice and your entire day's course will become clear!
Face your future with foreknowledge!
Sally Clueless of Budgie Downs writes: "I was lost until I found the Destiny Dice. Now I don't even get out of bed without consulting them!"
Roger Gullible of Hamsterdam writes: "Until I stole the Destiny Dice from my ex, I had no idea who to mug next. Now I know! Thanks, Destiny Dice!"
Shawn Kismetscareshim of New Nork writes: " I was forever wondering which documents to shred until I got Destiny Dice! They told me to quit that no-end accounting job. Now I rub pudding on my face and throw trout on my neighbor's lawn every day at six! I'm even shredding for myself now. No more oppression from corporate culture! I shred my own restraining orders instead!"
Whitney Tealeaves writes: "My life was a dark sucking hole of depression and despair until the Destiny Dice levitated me out of it using their astonishing floating force fields. Now I don't go anywhere without them! I even have them in my hand right now! The symbols have rubbed off, but I don't need them to know what the Dice are saying to me. They whisper their secrets in my ear and I just know what to do. They sound vaguely like the Thompson Twins."
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Please ask them a question for me.
Q:Should I take more pain-killers, or chop off my own head with the rusty axe hanging in the shed?
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Q:Should I take more pain-killers, or chop off my own head with the rusty axe hanging in the shed?
Your answer is "Luck" and "Sagittarius". Apparently you'll get lucky and a Sagittarius will chance upon the shed and chop off your head for you.
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*mops eyes*
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Do me! Just come up with any question you like.
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Should I carpet my living room with slugs, or would Astroturf be a better choice?
Your answer is "Compatability" and "Capricorn", so my best guess is that a Capricorn will stop by with handfuls of slugs and you'll realize that he'd make a great roommate, too, above and beyond his flooring abilities.
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Hmmm..."Success" and "Scorpio"...I'd say that in the next fourteen minutes you will suddenly find a Scorpio on your front door-step with a briefcase full of Peruvian shampoo samples and wearing a large pin that proudly says "Successful Salesman of the Year". He'll attempt to sell you a Special Eucalyptus Blend Shampoo and you'll point out that it would have to be an Australian shampoo if it contains Eucalyptus, and he'll begin to cry and tell you about his ailing mother and the triplets who don't have enough formula to last the night. You'll be so moved by his story that you'll call the police to have him forcibly removed and you'll think, wow, he's gone, and he dropped one of the Lavendar Mint Cactus Syrup Hair Balms. Success!
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Guess those dice really aren't that great, after all.
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At least you have some nifty ointment now.
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"Do I have to sweep this aisle? 'Signs point to no'? Woo-hoo!"
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Snicker...
Aeryn
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How's work going? I stayed home...too much snow.