Riding Knightly. Riding by Knight. Knight of a Thousand Riders.

[valis2]

Many thanks to ellid for sending me to a new archive, where I found all sorts of amusement.

• Kitt is found, having been ripped out of the shell of the car, and given a new body, one based on that of a human. Oh wow, I hadn't even thought of this--of course there would be KITT Ghost in the Shell diving into a human body stuff. All the better for the bawm chikka bawm bawm.


• Holy cow. subrosax was right. I've just found that there is Michael/KITT (IN CAR FORM) slash. *blinks* Dropping his hand to the warm hood, [Michael] stroked the smooth black shell with his fingertips. Wow. This is a form of slash for which I have no words.


• As wonderful as David Hasselhoff is, as much as I love him, and although he sparked the relationship between Michael Knight and Kitt in a way that brought the series to life; I still believe that in some ways, the Michael Knight he portrayed was a caricature of a person. NOES!! BLASPHEMER


• OMG, there is KITT h/c. Seriously. Spikes through the tires, buttons pulled out of the dash, all the windows smashed.


• A Christmas special! With a spectacular snow slopes chase! Please make it stop.


• Predictably, there about a million stories with the word knight in the title. And about a half million are puns on the word knight.


• Michael sat up on the low work bench, naked feet on Kitt's midnight hood, toes playing on the warm surface. Um, people, I don't know how many of these entries I can do after reading this.


• Having spent just over a year infultrating a gang of men determined to keep all those they consider too good for society away from the world, Michael has to make a difficult choice. The gang's leader decides that Michael's final display of loyalty must involve him putting six bullets through Kitt's dash board. ahahha! Yeah, because a gang leader would never want a car that could, you know, drive itself, was armored, and could outrace anything.


• This is a crossover of TKR with the established KR universe from above, that is: my KR universe :) Take what you've read so far and then push it a few years into the future, after Michael and Kitt have fulfilled the contract Michael signed in Beyond Loyalty. Now add TKR, its birth story slightly altered but with essentially all the events, people and cars, and you might get an idea of what I'm working on. Glad that's cleared up.


• For a moment, the rear wheels hit dust, catching the edge of the asphalt and skidding. Kitt caught the spin, wrapping his skill around it and forced the car back onto the road before it could more than throw up stones. Wrapping his whut around it?


• Author’s comment: Bulrush is a fictional town and doesn’t show up on any map of the Santa Catalina Island.


• This android body in which Kitt now walked was the second generation ‘Jez’, as Swan had called it. And what follows is page after page of Data-style oh-how-awkward-you-humans-are stuff.


• Telepathy! Seriously--there are several fics where KITT and Michael Knight have what I would call a Soul Bond in the HPverse.


• Gotta hand it to them...the fanfic people in this fandom are very graphics-oriented, and have lots of really cool fonts and images for their fanfic pages. Impressive.


• Devon's convertible waited silently, soulessly, uncaring that the life of the man that had brought it here had been shattered since it had been parked. Those non-talking cars are such uncaring bastards!

Comments

[florence-craye.livejournal.com]

OMG will no 80's series remain untouched? Growing Pains slash? What?

These entries continue to be hilarious.

[valis2.livejournal.com]

OMG will no 80's series remain untouched? Growing Pains slash? What?

Eventually I will find a Mr. T/ALF/Sonny Crockett threesomefic with a cameo from Alex P Keaton, and then my work will be done.

These entries continue to be hilarious.

I'm so glad! I was afraid they'd get annoying after awhile. And this one was so squicky, too...heh.

I have another entry finished and I'll put that up in a day or two, and I'm already at work on the one after that. Too bad I can't do this for a living, lol!

[oddmonster.livejournal.com]

Hi!

Yeah, because a gang leader would never want a car that could, you know, drive itself, was armored, and could outrace anything.
OMG I am laughing so hard. People are going to come stare and point.

This is a form of slash for which I have no words.
I was reading an article on metafandom last night, and found out that there are fics where SGA characters have been turned into cookies. And unicorns. *That* is the slash for which there are no words.

Kitt caught the spin, wrapping his skill around it and forced the car back onto the road before it could more than throw up stones.
Dude, it's bad enough he threw up stones. I feel like crap after I just throw up normal stuff.


# Author’s comment: Bulrush is a fictional town and doesn’t show up on any map of the Santa Catalina Island.
Shit. Cancel my weekend plans, then.

Those non-talking cars are such uncaring bastards!
You know, I used to have a temperamental VW van, and I have to say, I'm really glad it couldn't talk, because I'm guessing it would have been the biggest emo wiener on the highway. So there is something to be said for non-talking cars.

[seraphina_snape]

and found out that there are fics where SGA characters have been turned into cookies. And unicorns.

And penguins and turtles and ducks! Ah, those were the times... (Seriously. Nothing is cuter than a Rodney!duck.)

~ sera

[oddmonster.livejournal.com]

*blink*

[cordeliadelayne]

Oh, SGA does the best crack. We shouldn't forget the fish, or the ice cubes! *g*

And I have indeed written McKay and Sheppard as ducks :D

I don't think I've ever seen the cookie one though. *is curious*

[oddmonster.livejournal.com]

Okay, I have to read this. Link, please?

[cordeliadelayne]

Sure. Here you go :D

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Fish? Ice cubes? I don't even know the first thing about this fandom, but it makes me want to start writing summary entries about them, too.

[cordeliadelayne]

Oh, I adore the SGA fandom; we're certainly a creative bunch when it comes to um, pretty much everything!

I'm sure you could find plenty of things to write about - the show just really lends itself to crackfic (mostly deliberately). *g*

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Hilarious! So many of my flisters have wandered off into that fandom already...

[valis2.livejournal.com]

OMG I am laughing so hard. People are going to come stare and point.

hee!!! I'm glad you enjoyed.

I was reading an article on metafandom last night, and found out that there are fics where SGA characters have been turned into cookies. And unicorns. *That* is the slash for which there are no words.

*blinks* You know what? You're right. That is the slash for which there are no words. I mean...cookies? Do the characters eat each other? Huh?

# Author’s comment: Bulrush is a fictional town and doesn’t show up on any map of the Santa Catalina Island.
Shit. Cancel my weekend plans, then.

And don't go looking for it, if you know what's good for you. Catch my drift?

You know, I used to have a temperamental VW van, and I have to say, I'm really glad it couldn't talk, because I'm guessing it would have been the biggest emo wiener on the highway. So there is something to be said for non-talking cars.

My car would say, "OMG, you put 20,000 miles on me in six months, WTF is with you?!"

[oddmonster.livejournal.com]

I mean...cookies? Do the characters eat each other? Huh?
Well how else would they do it? :)

[valis2.livejournal.com]

I do not want to know where the frosting comes from.

[oddmonster.livejournal.com]

Dude. I am never going to be able to look at sandwich cookies the same way ever again.

[seraphina_snape]

I've just found that there is Michael/KITT (IN CAR FORM) slash.

And you were surprised? Haven't you heard of rule 34? Besides, KITT had more personality than most of these so-called guest stars. (I'd draw the line at the soul mates thing though. I mean, getting it on with your artificially intelligent car is one thing, having a soul link to it quite another...)

~ sera

[valis2.livejournal.com]

I must admit, I was not expecting this. I swear. I mean, I've read so much HP bad!fic that I've seen fics where Snape gets turned into a baby crib, but sometimes in unfamiliar fandoms I do still get broadsided by the obvious...hee!

And the soul link theme seems to be quite popular. I was pretty amazed by how many people want those two to be one.

[seraphina_snape]

Oh, HP can prepare you for a lot of what people get up to in bad!fic. I don't think I'd be shocked by squid porn (giant squid/Remus Lupin, I think it was, and it was mpreg, too) or anything that's even more harmless by comparison.

Heh. Can you imagine Riptide/Cody? Or Nick/Mimi? Murray/Roboz? *g* I think I want someone to write me Murray/Roboz fic.

~ sera

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I've read that squid/RL fic, lol! I've read squid/SS mpreg as well.

Heh. Can you imagine Riptide/Cody? Or Nick/Mimi? Murray/Roboz? *g* I think I want someone to write me Murray/Roboz fic.

Murray/Roboz does seem like a good ship, lol. But Riptide/Ebb Tide would be hot, too.

[oddmonster.livejournal.com]

Okay, why is Riptide/Ebb Tide making sense? Why is that appealing?

[valis2.livejournal.com]

ahaha! They'd be great metaphors for Nick/Cody...Riptide/Nick: old-fashioned, always dependable. Ebb Tide/Cody: Flashy, pretty, doesn't always have the long-range issues worked out. *snerk*

[seraphina_snape]

*g* I think everyone's read that squid/RL fic. Or at least knows it exists.

Riptide/Ebb Tide would rock. Although I'm not sure how exactly that would work. At least with Murray and the Roboz, you have some sort of starting point, but with two boats?

~ sera

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Well, considering I've read Hogwarts/Giant Squid that actually worked, I'm sure that Riptide/Ebb Tide could be accomplished as well. ha!

[seraphina_snape]

If all else fails, they could always develop a telepathic bond and have mental soul!sex...

~ sera

[valis2.livejournal.com]

ahahah! Yes, exactly!!

[cordeliadelayne]

Snape gets turned into a baby crib

I missed this comment earlier because...what?!

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Yes, a living baby crib. Ribs for slats.

I can't find the link, and honestly, I don't think I want to, unless you rilly rilly need to see it. It's really...uncomfortable. And frightening. Remus is turned into a stuffed werewolf with a glass eye that holds his soul...Harry is de-aged...*shivers*

[cordeliadelayne]

OMFG. No, no, no link necessary, I'm disturbed by the very idea such a thing exists as it is. Eep!

*thinks happy thoughts*

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Yes, it's best forgotten. Wish I could.

[cordeliadelayne]

Hee hee! I still believe that in some ways, the Michael Knight he portrayed was a caricature of a person

Just...what?

I'm really glad you're carrying on with these, they certainly brighten my day :D

[valis2.livejournal.com]

I'm really glad you're carrying on with these, they certainly brighten my day :D

hee!! I'm so totally glad!!

I have another one ready to go--I'll put it up in a day or two, and I'm working on the next already. This really is too much fun.

[ellid.livejournal.com]

I think the one that most had me going "Bzuh?" was the one with the Mary Sue computer programmer who somehow had sex with the car. The HELL?

[valis2.livejournal.com]

AHAHHA!!!

I haven't seen that one yet...sounds priceless!

And thank you SO much for the link, what a treasure!!

[todayiamadaisy]

Having spent just over a year infultrating a gang of men determined to keep all those they consider too good for society away from the world, Michael has to make a difficult choice. The gang's leader decides that Michael's final display of loyalty must involve him putting six bullets through Kitt's dash board.

You know, that would be kind of interesting if it had been the other way round, with Kitt being forced to kill Michael. Because you can see what a such a gang would want with Kitt... not so much the Hoff. :-)

[valis2.livejournal.com]

You know, that would be kind of interesting if it had been the other way round, with Kitt being forced to kill Michael. Because you can see what a such a gang would want with Kitt... not so much the Hoff. :-)

Exactly!! *laughs and laughs*

I think they'd take one look at the car, and one look at Michael, and leave Michael on a street corner somewhere.