The usual jitters.

[valis2]

I am now in Full Utter Freakout Mode, otherwise known as The Night Before A Big Trip meltdown.

Tomorrow morning. 7:30 am. Me and my vehicle. And I won't be back for a month. The schedule is looking pretty damn scary at this point.

I've been a bit more on the ball about this than normal, I have to admit. Clothes/bathroom stuff pretty much packed; vehicle ready to go. I still need to print out a few more assorted maps, pack the assorted electronica, pack a few things for WI, and do a few things. I need to pack up all of the four million sheets of paper (routes, phone numbers, map books, etc.) and...urgh.

I have the next chapter halfway done, and I'm torn about finishing it before I go. I have so much left to do, but I've already invested the time to get halfway through the chapter, and I might as well complete it. I don't think odddollsstories will have time to beta it, though, unless by some miracle she's on tonight.



I am a big homebody. I love to stay home. I love my apartment, my bed, my sweet happy pillow. I love everything about home.

But I also have this capitalistic streak in me. I like to make money. And I'm hoping that this trip will be a good one, though signs point to unknown. It could be horrible too, it could destroy me financially. I'm still unsure.

But I have those excited feelings of "ooh, good show" coming on. A few of the stores have done a LOT of advertising and groundwork, and I'm just crossing my fingers that it will pay off. I'm so worried and freaked out but at the same time the part of me that likes to sell is jumping up and down in excitement.

I always had this negative view of salespeople my whole life. Now I find that I understand it so much more. Over the last four years I've been lucky, because I don't have to do a "hard sell" at all; my friends' product sells itself. But I still have this understanding about how difficult it can be, and what a salesperson's role in the economy is.

Anyway, my goodbye message will be tomorrow morning. I hate leaving those. I hate that moment where I get in the car and turn the stereo on and cry and drive out on the street, away from my happy bees.

Of course, usually I forget something and have to come back a minute later, but then, when I'm really on the road, I'm so very very sad. This is a really long trip. When it's a whole month it really makes it difficult.

There's always that moment when you're halfway across the States and you realize just how long it would take to get home and you miss it oh so very much.

I'm just rambling and avoiding packing at this point. *sigh*

Comments

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Oh, thanks! I'm certain I'll have a lot to say...and hopefully I'll have photographic evidence, as well. ;)