Not the best of days.

[valis2]

I'm freaking out at the new 6A stuff, worried that fandom is going to freak out and dissipate here on LJ just before we all need it most. I also paid for a permanent journal, and am now worried that I'll regret it.

Even worse, yesterday I did something unbelievably dumb.

I signed up for four Thursday night shows, and last night was one of them. Well, last week's show was horrid. The threat of bad weather ruined it. So I looked on the radar, and saw a string of thunderstorms moving through, and then looked at the city-specific forecast, and it called for t-storms at 4pm and at 9pm. Well, the show is only from 5-9pm, and there is a concert involved...and no one likes wet grass, right? Not to mention that it's almost a two hour drive, and it's $30 worth of gas, and I am ABSOLUTELY BROKE right now. Last week COST me money. So then I thought I wouldn't go.

But then I changed my mind. I looked at the forecast again, and it said there would be a few hours of partly cloudy weather in there, and I figured, what the hell. I might as well. My car's loaded already.

So I got in my car and drove twenty miles, into a windy, nasty storm o' doom. I decided to turn back, because the clouds looked like they went on forever.

I am such an idiot. I even looked at the radar, and knew that it was a strip of storms. I got home, and within minutes the storm hit, and then?

SUNNY. BEAUTIFUL. WEATHER.

And it was too late to go back.

I am so angry at myself. I need money more than ever, and customers knew I was going to be there, and I'm quite certain I would have had a few sales, at the very least.

And I'm depressed for other reasons, too, but won't go into that. Nothing RL, don't worry.

Comments

[marginaliana]

*hugs*

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Aw, thanks. I'm just trying to not get caught in a whirlpool of depression right now. I'm feeling a lot of things at once, wah.

[florence-craye.livejournal.com]

Awww, that sucks! I hope things improve for you soon. *hugs* :)

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Me too. I think I'll try to throw myself headlong into working at home, maybe cleaning some things up, and then hopefully I'll feel better.

[gmonkey42.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry you're having a crummy time. {{hugs}}

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Aw, thanks, sweetie. This costume is really getting to me, as well as the missed opportunity yesterday. I think I've only ducked out of a show once before, and it just brings out the worst feelings. It's like when you pretend you're sick to stay home, y'know. Even though I was making (what I thought was) a rational decision, it still makes me cringe.

[logospilgrim.livejournal.com]

*tender robed embrace*

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Oh, thank you so very much. I really need it.

*giant hug*

[saruwatari.livejournal.com]

.__________. Argh, that's awful.

*sends virtual chocolate*

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Aw, thanks so much. *hugs*

*munches on chocolate*

[cafemercury.livejournal.com]

((Hugs))

I'm sorry you're going through a rough time right now.

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Me too. Thanks for the hugs, I really appreciate them.

*hugs in return*

[sylvadin.livejournal.com]

Suggestion - stop beating yourself up. You're tired, you're wired, you're stressed out - none of which would have helped you make sales even if you did attend that show. Chalk up that skipped event to a 'took a mental health sick day'. Stop fretting about sales or about anything business related. Just say a quick prayer and hand over to the gods the responsibility for all that - they have the broad view map - when your business is fated to get back on track, they'll get you there.

Now, spend today just doing something that's relaxing and fun - that's an order from a fellow merchant who's 'been there' often enough to know. Liberal use of medicinal chocolate is also suggested. *g*

...I'm freaking out at the new 6A stuff, worried that fandom is going to freak out and dissipate here on LJ just before we all need it most...

I'm not sure what '6A' stuff is, but, if you're referring to HP fandom, I'd say - don't panic! Yes, there's been lots of emoting and comments of 'if JKR kills off so-and-so, I'm leaving fandom'. Yes, some of those people might follow through on those threats. BUT I'm also now seeing lots of fanfic writers and artists standing up and saying 'It doesn't matter to me what happens in the final book, I still have lots of stories left to share'. I'll still be writing my Snagrid series; I've received declarations from my flist that they'll be doing the same in their OTP. There's plenty of us who consider the HP LJ groups our home - and we're staying.

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Suggestion - stop beating yourself up. You're tired, you're wired, you're stressed out - none of which would have helped you make sales even if you did attend that show. Chalk up that skipped event to a 'took a mental health sick day'. Stop fretting about sales or about anything business related. Just say a quick prayer and hand over to the gods the responsibility for all that - they have the broad view map - when your business is fated to get back on track, they'll get you there.

Your words are just what I need, do you know that? *sighs*

I'm really trying to calm down about it, but I'm just so upset. I feel like I got "caught" taking a sick day that wasn't really a sick day. When I sat on the couch, and saw the sun shining, I got so upset.

I'm still feeling very guilty about it. But it's done, now, and I can't really change it, and I should stop being so upset about it. You're right.

I'm not sure what '6A' stuff is, but, if you're referring to HP fandom, I'd say - don't panic!

6 Apart is the company who know owns LJ, and they're revising their ToS, and it's provoked a lot of people to get insanely angry...angry enough to leave.

I'm very much hoping that fandom will continue, but I really have to be realistic and say that there is definitely a Potterpocalypse looming ahead of us, at least for a little while.

[jen-deben.livejournal.com]

*hugz oo muchly*

That does suck, and I'm sorry it happened.

Don't worry; fandom will go on, just like that sappy song from the Titanic movie. Listen for it - you can hear Celine singing, can't you? "My [fandom] weeeal go aaaah-aaaaah-onnnnn..."

*hugs again*

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Yes, fandom will go on, no matter who dies or what happens (just think Sirius); but I do predict that some of my favorite flisters will walk away...or have already walked away. It's just sad. It feels like the end of a very fun period of my life.

I'm not saying there won't be more fun periods in my life, just that I'm sad to see what looks like curtains falling on this stage. :(

[dark-cygnet.livejournal.com]

*squishes you* we can be depressed together. I'm writing you out a prescription to fix the woe.

1. Grab copy of The Black Swan and watch it.
2. While watching it, partake of favorite foods in the yellow crunchy food group-or whatever you like-and favorite drink.
3. Daydream about Severus giving you a back rub.
4. While doing all of the above, just realize we've all been there. don't beat yourself up, it's already happened, let it go. Be in the moment, sugar!

Oh and last but not least...SWANSMOOCHES!

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Oooh...what lovely suggestions! Thank you so much, you really are such a sweetheart.

#1 sounds really great right now, seriously. I could use a bit of Tommy Blue's wisdom!

*giant hugs*

*lionsmooches ahoy!*

[http://users.livejournal.com/_grainne_/]

*hugs*

If nothing else, I expect to be around, prodding you to write squidfic, for some time to come. I mean, COME ON, unless JKR is one really sick cruppy, the Giant Squid survives Book 7.

*nods emphatically*

Now, stay dry and safe and preferably smiley...Snape needs us.

Come on ladies, if you believe...if you really believe in Snape...clap your hands!

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Aw, you're so very sweet! *hugs and lurves*

At least I can still write squidfic. There's always squid!

<hugs>

[raventbear.livejournal.com]

Hope you feeling better and I'm sure you'll sell at other shows. Try not to stress too hard.

~Almost Acid

ps, I have your pic somewhere buried in apartment, when I located i'll mail it out to you or have Acid draw your another to mail out.

Re: <hugs>

[valis2.livejournal.com]

Almost Acid!!!!!!!!! hahahahaha!!

I see you were finally drawn out into LJ land. Hilarious!

And I love the wee turtle!!

*hugs*